we have officially lost it.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
