she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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