When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
