Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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