I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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