So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
