Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Randomize
