Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
