Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
so let's talk penis.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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