i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
i believe in u and ur pee
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
