i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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