A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
