i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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