oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize