Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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