My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
