And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
