I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
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All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
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No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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