rhymes with "ouble enetration"
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
