You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I haven't been this sober since birth.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize