i think my tv is drunk
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
