please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
