Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
