would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
