I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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