shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
