There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
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