I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
