My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
