Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
