talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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