Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize