Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize