I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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