oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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