ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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