and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she smelled like a LAN party
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
