Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
actually, I'm a sock model
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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