nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
