CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
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He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
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the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver