We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
