I can tuck mytits in my pants
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Is Oprah even human
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
