How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
