Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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