just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize