That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
i think my cat just said my name.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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