i just had sex bonerless
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Randomize
