just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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