She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
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Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
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My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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