Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize