I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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